Do you ever just sit in awe at how God works? How He knows what you need when you need it? Jake and I have been going through kind of a rough time just with different things going on in our lives. It seems that we go back and forth encouraging one another but of course are never on the same positive page at the same time! So a few days this week it was my turn to do my "Negative Nellie" routine. I just couldn't get out of my slump. Although I knew that I should have displayed a better attitude, I just couldn't seem to move past my frustrations, doubts and my fears of what would be.
About a month ago, while on vacation, I decided that I wanted to try and find a book that would encourage me in doing my daily devotions. I had a conversation with a dear friend about the importance of doing our devotions first thing in the morning so you could ponder them the rest of the day (and also so they didn't get lost in the shuffle of other daily activities) and decided that I was lacking in this area and I needed a boost. So, I found a book at Baker Bookhouse called The Women's Devotional Guide to the Bible by Jane Syswerda. (I would recommend it if you'd like some really good daily devotionals)! Anyway, I knew I wanted something to help me along, but also wasn't quite sure why I was getting it.....I should be able to do devotions through my own discipline and study by now, I would think! I purchased the book and began my new daily routine of waking up at 6 a.m., doing my devotions with a hot cup of java in my hand.....a glorious way to start the day, I must say!
Last week I just couldn't make it out of bed in the morning, usually because Jake and I were up in the middle of the night with Cole. I kept thinking throughout Monday (the first of my grumpy days), I should just do my devotions. But alas, I never cracked open my new book or my Bible. Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday go by and I'm still in my mood, never once turning to God's Word.
FINALLY! Friday I do the assigned Scripture readings which happened to be on Abraham and Sarah. Then, I read the summary of the text in my devotional book. It said,
"God often does the impossible, working through the unlikely, accomplishing what you might think is absurdly improbable. He doesn't do it just for fun. God always has a purpose. God knows what He's doing. Don't ever doubt it, even when it seems debatable. Look at the mess Abraham and Sarah created when they doubted. They took matters into their own hands and produced a son through Hagar. The resulting chaos had nothing to do with God's perfect plan to create a nation through another son, Isaac. As the story of Abraham demonstrates, waiting and trusting that God knows what He's doing is always the better option."
I couldn't believe my eyes! This addressed everything, and I mean EVERYTHING that Jake and I were dealing with all week! Doubt, fear, trying to figure out the easy road and whether or not we should take it, etc. Now, I'm not superstitious, so I don't think that I have been punished for not doing my devotions all week.....BUT! If I had read this on Monday and taken a lesson from Abraham and Sarah, oh the burden it could have lifted off of my shoulders and the peace and hope it could have provided!
I believe with my whole heart that God is a sovereign God who knows what we need, when we need it and is there to provide it for us. I believe He knew that I would need this lesson this week and He used a conversation from two months ago to encourage me to spend more time in His Word. I know this has happened to many of you as you read the Bible and different things pop out at you in ways they never had before and it's something that you needed in that moment. Isn't God the greatest? He is so loving.....loving enough to touch us in the simplest ways. I am looking forward again to my mornings with my Father......and to the lessons He is waiting to teach me.